If you had the opertunity to run the Country

I would make Pluto a planet again!

 

Well shoot! I 'ad de opertunity to run de country fer the past 6 years - me 'an Dick and I think we did a bang up job! Be a bit harder now, with Rummy gone, but dang it all - ain't I still commander in chief? I'm the decider, not dos snivel'in democrat girly men from the liberal northeast establiment - those Yalies and Skull and Bonesers. Losers! Anyways, let 'em come. Before you can skin a cat I'll be on my way to Paraquay. Hey, on my way, Paraquay - that pretty good.

 

I would strap all of our ICBM's to the ground facing the same direction, and fire their engines all at once, in an effort to speed the rotational speed of the Earth.

It's kind of a complicated scheme, I admit.

Thing is, I've been trying to lose a few pounds recently and figure this might be an easy way to reach my goal (even if my mass remains the same).

I suppose the idea is a bit self-centered, though...

 

This is absurd. Everyone else would lose the same number of pounds and you would lose your bragging rights.

 

I would make "Death and Glory" by The Clash our national anthem.

 

<div class='quotetop'>QUOTE(jared2 @ Nov 10 2006, 03:18 PM) [snapback]347112[/snapback]</div>

Oh.

Yeah.

Well...

Maybe I'd make everyone else wear weight belts...yeah!, that's what I'd do.
I mean, I do run the country, after all...right...?

Gosh, what a heady feeling of power!!

__________________




<div class='quotetop'>QUOTE(Stev0 @ Nov 10 2006, 03:28 PM) [snapback]347120[/snapback]</div>

..."it's just another story..."

 

Seriously, what would I do?

Well, I'm currently a bit short of specifics, but I'd do whatever it takes to create a spirit of bipartisanship in government and the citizenry at large.

What I would attempt is a sort of grassroots groundswell movement of positivity and acceptance. Where we all encourage each other to do better.

I would also begin to put together five, ten, twenty, and fifty year plans for the country that we would begin to discuss en masse, and amend.

Questions would include:
--Where do we see ourselves then?
--What might be barriers to getting there?
--If our country was a person, how would we like someone else to describe us?
--How do they describe us now?
--How did this happen? (not 'who is responsible?') and where do we go from here?

What we'd be working towards is a timeline for implementing various tactics to address various issues...that way, we'd know where we're headed and if we're going in the right direction. And we'd try to have some sort of agreement up front. No more being reactionary; we're too big and slow for that to be an effective policy.

I would implement my 'safe zone' plan for Iraq, and encourage the citizens there to take control of their environment with contributions of money and goods that are not directly tied to any U.S. policy goals...simply to say, "we're spending x dollars every day to destroy your stuff...if you can partner with us to work towards stability, we'll give what it costs us to fund military protection, so you can rebuild yourselves."

Domestically, I'd press for increased cultural awareness training, with a goal of highlighting the unique attributes of different peoples throughout the world.

I'd also begin to transition us toward a 35-hour workweek and three weeks of mandatory vacation for full time workers.

I would increase the base level of support for public schools, but also would encourage those who have children to contribute more to their schools on an idividual basis, in an effor to help people gain ownership/take responsibility for their children's education.

To that end, I would pursue policies that increased the value/buying power of the Dollar, and might one day allow us to return to a situation where one person's income is sufficient to fund a decent way of life for that person and their family.

I would instigate a 'pay up front' policy for domestic and foreign programs. Basically, if we can't afford it, we're not going to do it (with some certain key exceptions, of course). I mean it, too...people would probably hate me at first, but they'd thank me sooner rather than later.

Oh gosh, I'm just getting started...

 

<div class='quotetop'>QUOTE(Godiva @ Aug 23 2006, 11:07 AM) [snapback]308385[/snapback]</div>

Can ya fix that dog's ears?

Wildkow

p.s. BTW it costs more to execute someone than keep them in prison for life, unless of course your talking about taking away some of they're rights.

 

<div class='quotetop'>QUOTE(Pinto Girl @ Nov 10 2006, 12:14 PM) [snapback]347107[/snapback]</div>

LOL! :lol:

<div class='quotetop'>QUOTE(jared2 @ Nov 10 2006, 12:18 PM) [snapback]347112[/snapback]</div>

:lol: LOL! :lol: LOL! :lol:

<div class='quotetop'>QUOTE(Pinto Girl @ Nov 10 2006, 01:00 PM) [snapback]347141[/snapback]</div>

Don't feel bad so is the rest of the demoncratic party. . .

Wildkow

 

Oh, another thing I'd do is make all capital punishment illegal. Except on people who use apostrophes to make plurals.

 

1. Help invest in more nuclear power plants - they do put out much less green house gases than other fossil plants.

2. Next I would mandate that the airlines provide more leg/butt room in coach and provide decent in-flight meals.

3.. Devise a way to have the Congress really represent the people - vote like their constituents want - not the way they want even if no one else likes it.

4. Have an ongoing tax break for good folks like us who drive hybrids - the higher the mpg, the greater the tax break.

5. And finally free cable TV to all.

 

<div class='quotetop'>QUOTE(Pinto Girl @ Nov 10 2006, 12:14 PM) [snapback]347107[/snapback]</div>

Well, it's easy to pinpoint the weight gain problem: the earth's rotation has been SLOWED down over the past century by all the dam building in the developed world, trapping thousands of cubic miles of fresh water at 8 pounds a gallon well above sea level in valleys formerly occupied by thin air. The effect is identical to that of a spinning skater stretching out her arms to slow down the rate of spin, and the earth's rotation has been measurably retarded by this recent relocation of wet mass from sea level to a few thousand feet above it. And here all this time you thought the extra weight was too many orders of fries.

If the ICBM scheme falls through (inevitable bureaucratic bungling), the collapse of the Greenland icecap due to global warming will relocate the earth's largest single repository of fresh water back to sea level (an elevated sea level, but still sea level), and with all our weights subsequently reduced by the abrupt acceleration of earth's rotation when that happens, we'll all be able to consume extra large orders of jumbo fries in perfect safety (although the fries may be a bit soggy in coastal areas like Denver and Des Moines that didn't realize they'd need to build their seawalls quite as soon as originally thought).

All of this assumes, of course, that the continent does not sink under the weight of all the piles of saved National Geographics first - a constant and ever increasing hazard with each passing monthly edition.

Mark Baird
Alameda CA

 

<div class='quotetop'>QUOTE(airportkid @ Nov 10 2006, 09:26 PM) [snapback]347285[/snapback]</div>

Actually the weight of the saved National Geographics is less that the weight of the material that was used to make them therefore instead of sinking the earth should be floating away.