Long Distance Relationships...

Was once.... didn't work out too well. But I know people who have done it successfully for many many years & it is still working. Hope you can make it work!

 

It seems like the whole point of a relationship is so you can spend time with that person, exclusively; placing distance between each other tends to defeat that purpose, in my opinion.

There are, of course, extenuating circumstances.

 

I met the love of my life at college (Rochester, NY) over 3 years ago. Unfortunately, circumstances required that I transfer to a school closer to home (Long Island, NY). We managed to make it work, mostly because we are committed to each other (and trust each other). I flew to Rochester as often as I could. Now she has graduated and is pursuing her PhD in Boston, so it's much closer, and an easy (and cheap) 3.5 hour drive in the Prius. I still don't see her as much as I would like, but once I finish my program in a year and a half, I'll move to Boston and we plan on getting married soon after.

 

<div class='quotetop'>QUOTE(Loail @ Jul 26 2007, 12:31 PM) [snapback]485548[/snapback]</div>

I guess it is all prospective! Most people would consider 3.5 hours to be long distance. When my wife and I where dating in college she was at a school that was 1.5 hours away. All my friends were amazed that we could maintain such a "long distance relationship". :lol: I think it was good because we weren't with each other constantly getting on one another's nerves. The weekends we spent together were special. When she did a 4 month research project in upstate NY, that was hard though. I only got to see her for 2 days the entire time she was gone.

All in all like Loail said, it's about commitment and trust. My wife and I have been together for 12 years now. We started dating senior year of High School.

 

Met the woman who I eventually married while I was living in the San Francisco Bay Area and she was living in Boston, 3000 miles away. We only met In Real Life about three times before deciding to get married (although we did email each other and talk on the phone almost daily for a year and a half). When we got married 10 months later, she moved to the Bay Area with me, so I can't tell you how a long distance marriage works out.

 

While it doesn't apply to me, i have a friend who just got engaged - her soon-to-be has been in Australia for the past year or so, while she's been stuck here in MN.

 

<div class='quotetop'>QUOTE(Stev0 @ Jul 26 2007, 03:38 PM) [snapback]485658[/snapback]</div>

I was in one of those where I (living in MN) and the GF in the DC area. But that was 22 years ago, got married, been that way ever since, wouldn't change a thing.

 

I had one of those while in the 5th grade.
She sat on one end of the couch, I sat on the other.
That was too close, so I got out of there.

 

Beat this: Two countries, 9,000 miles in between. Four years. Have seen each other 11 days total in life.

 

<div class='quotetop'>QUOTE(Michgal007 @ Jul 27 2007, 10:53 AM) [snapback]486208[/snapback]</div>

Apparently you don't know many US Navy sailors, do you. :lol:

 

I was in one, dated a girl for 3yrs we would see eachother for a month during the summer.
One day I was driving a semi and making a delivery and I thought I would suprise her by popping in!

She surprised me by the guy who anwered the door, turned into a bad trip after that.

I know others that have long distance relationships they are not exclusive they still date others but meet 3-4 times a year and are exclucive when together but thats it and it works for them...

Other wise its kinda like pen-pals with an occasional hook-up.

On the otherside of the coin the armed forces has what some call shore (P)**** A navy friend was telling me they used to get serviced by one of these if they got hard-up at sea..

I dont really know if it was true but........ :mellow:

 

I guess my relationship might count as one. My fiancee is in North Carolina and I'm currently in Cotonou in the West-African republic of Benin (right there next to Nigeria!). Shortly before we started dating I had submitted my application to join the Foreign Service and we had dated for over a year by the time my acceptance letter arrived. It was a very hard decidion to decide whether to stay in North Carolina with her or to join the Foreign Service for parts unknown. She was very supportive of me joining the F.S. and we decided to give the long-distance relationship thing a try. While I was in training in the D.C. area for about 6 months we were able to visit each other every 2-3 weeks for a weekend, and during that time we decided to get engaged to get married. We set the wedding for the time during my home leave after my tour in Benin and before I head off to my second tour, wherever that will be. She has children from her previous marriage and wants to stay home until they are out of the house, and it looks like she will be joining me about halfway through my second tour.

Even though we're separated by continents, we still see each other on rare occasion - I went home for one week to visit her a couple of months ago, I once went to Frankfurt for a one-week training course and flew her in and we spent the time there together (one week with the weekend on either end), and in a few months I will fly her in to Benin so we can tour this place together, along with a trek up to the Pendjari park.

Other than that, Skype is a GODSEND, and we talk practically daily, usually for half an hour or longer. And if I catch her at home and not on her cell phone, I even have enough bandwidth here in Benin to make a Skype video-call work. So, even though we are not physically together and are dearly missing the human contact, we are still part of each other's daily lives.

Best of luck to all of you out there in long-distance relationships!

 

You mean 'long distance' physically, right, not emotionally? :huh:

 

I met my husband while I was still in high school, and we'd been dating a couple of years when I went away to college. I chose a school only about two hours away, so we still had many weekends and any time we could spare otherwise. It was hard, but we sort of figured that if we couldn't manage distance, we wouldn't do do well with the sickness or the worse of a permanent relationship.

 

<div class='quotetop'>QUOTE(Michgal007 @ Jul 27 2007, 01:53 PM) [snapback]486208[/snapback]</div>

Are you still together? An by "together", I mean not in the physical sense..