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Ever see an entire newspaper go through a snowblower?

Discussion in 'Fred's House of Pancakes' started by qbee42, Feb 19, 2009.

  1. qbee42

    qbee42 My other car is a boat

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    My parents still insist on getting a paper newspaper, so any time I snow-blow their driveway in the morning I have to look for the paper first. Their newspaper delivery person puts the paper in a bright orange plastic bag and tosses it into the driveway, where it quickly disappears under the drifting snow.

    Usually my wife finds their paper and puts it on their steps, and she did so this morning. I thought I was safe, but the newspaper person out-foxed me. She missed yesterday's delivery, and apparently tried to make up for it by leaving *two* papers today. My wife found one.

    "Whump, Whoomph"; that's the sound of an entire bagged newspaper going through a snowblower. The amount of confetti is truly impressive, what with all the bits of orange shredded plastic, the colorful advertising inserts, and of course bushels of black and white newsprint. It's blowing about 30 mph, so the new confetti is seeing a lot of play in the neighborhood.

    Tom
     
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  2. efusco

    efusco Moderator Emeritus
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    I was hoping for a youtube video.
     
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  3. qbee42

    qbee42 My other car is a boat

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    I wish I had one. I only had time to hear the "Whump, Whoomph", feel the shudder, and go "What the f...". All I could do was say "Oh crap" and laugh. It was just like a confetti gun. The initial blast went thirty feet in the air and instantly covered our front yard. I suppose it will become part of the jetsam and detritus that accumulates every year when the snow melts.

    Tom
     
  4. NYPrius1

    NYPrius1 Active Member

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    I had this happen to me a few years ago. The paper person left the paper in the driveway and it was covered with snow. My snow blower had it for lunch. The blower was completely clogged and cost over 200.00 to be fixed. Now when it snows I check to see if the paper is in the box, if not I dig to find it first.
     
  5. qbee42

    qbee42 My other car is a boat

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    You need a bigger snowblower. Mine doesn't even hesitate on something as small as a newspaper. It does a good job with wet leaves and small sticks too.

    Our snow removal requirements are fairly severe, so we use rather heavy equipment. I used to own two large Honda snowblowers, but I gave my old one to my son. I may regret it if the new one ever fails during a big storm.

    Tom
     
  6. hyo silver

    hyo silver Awaaaaay

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    I hope it's loud enough to scare away any children and other small animals. Otherwise you could make a real mess. :eek:
     
  7. qbee42

    qbee42 My other car is a boat

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    I haven't been able to catch any of them. I need a faster top gear.

    If you want to see a really scary snowblower, take a look at one of the big Oshkosh rotary snowplows. Our county road crews use them up here to carve back the snow banks once the plows run out of room to push the snow. I hope I never hit one of those.

    Tom
     
  8. hyo silver

    hyo silver Awaaaaay

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    I've seen some pretty heavy duty snow equipment on ski runs, from closer than I'd like. Either they need louder beepers or I need less wind noise in my ears. Remember that chase scene in one of the first James Bond movies? One of the bad guys was turned into a cream soda slushie.
     
  9. Don-RI

    Don-RI Member

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    Quite a few of us at work have done it, and our accounting controller did damage his snowthrower with his Sunday paper. But what's even more impressive is that he called & persuaded someone in the paper's business office enough to get them to cut him a check for the $85 cost to repair his machine. I guess we're lucky that we have him on *our* side handling business transactions.
     
  10. jayman

    jayman Senior Member

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    Will your snowblower handle a phonebook?

    Once a year we get a new phonebook delivered, and the kid will usually put it on the front step. When I had the house in Tuxedo, I hadn't realized we had the phone books dropped off in the middle of a blizzard

    I used to have a 12 hp Craftsman blower. Opened the garage door, fired it up, and went at the drifts. Suddenly: WHOMPH CLANG

    Busted the belt, and the shear pins on the augers. I'm bright enough to keep spare shear pins and belts, but it still took me a couple of hours to get the auger cleared, parts replaced, and back in operation

    I kind of wish I had hit the kid instead. Little bugger, who drops off a brand new phone book in a plastic bag, in the middle of a driveway?
     
  11. jelloslug

    jelloslug It buffed right out!

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    What is this "snow" material you speak of?
     
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  12. tleonhar

    tleonhar Senior Member

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    I knew there'd be one :cool:
    It's nature's way of providing us guys one more thing to buy tools for.
    I didn't grind up any papers or phonebooks yet, but while I was cleaning up an unusually big drift this winter, I got off the driveway and found one of our solar lights. :eek: They sure grind up into a lot of pieces.
     
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  13. qbee42

    qbee42 My other car is a boat

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    I haven't tried a phonebook. A number of years ago I attempted to run a 2x4 through my old Honda snowblower. That cost me a broken shear pin, a bent impeller, and a broken woodruff key on the drive shaft.

    As for our newer snowblower, it would have a better chance with the phonebook. I don't know if it would do it, but it does have sharp serrated teeth on the auger. It's kind of scary.

    Tom
     
  14. KK6PD

    KK6PD _ . _ . / _ _ . _

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    No, but I once saw a Trumpet player play 2 Trumpets at once, once!!
     
  15. billarb

    billarb New Member

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    While it's about a different power tool, reading this thread evoked images of my favorite scene in movie history. Of course I'm talking about the wood chipper scene in "Fargo!"
     
  16. jayman

    jayman Senior Member

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    The Honda snowblowers are direct drive? Instead of a belt, it's all gear and drive shaft, so a guy claimed to me

    You're lucky you didn't bend the rod in the engine. At the cabin I used to have, I wasn't paying attention while mowing the "lawn" - weeds and wild grasses - and managed to nail a rock with my cheap yard sale Lawnboy

    The bugger jumped up in the air, landed back on its little wheels, and started shaking like crazy. A real bad vibration, a bit of a knocking, and I knew the motor was done. Glad I only paid $30 for it

    Yeah I've seen those newer HD snowblowers. I have no need for such a machine, as I have the tractor and work truck at the hobby farm, and my driveway at the house is barely 25 ft

    However, such a machine would work pretty good on some of the more annoying neighbor kids
     
  17. jayman

    jayman Senior Member

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    I can only imagine how he was able to play the second trumpet. Did he have to eat a lot of chilli and beer?
     
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  18. jayman

    jayman Senior Member

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    That scene was pretty faked. I *real* woodchipper would have no problem at all with soft flabby skin and some bones

    I have an old woodchipper at the hobby farm that runs off the tractor PTO. I fear that machine, and only use it when I really have to.

    The machine will eagerly grab and grind up even 10 inch poplar. If I were to ever slip, I would be a human sourced sloppy joe in a matter of seconds
     
  19. qbee42

    qbee42 My other car is a boat

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    "Waaaaaammmp" and you would be done, just like that.

    Tom
     
  20. tripp

    tripp Which it's a 'ybrid, ain't it?

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    Some bloke in CT chipped his wife out into the Shepaug river. They dragged it and found 'er wedding ring and little bits and pieces of 'er. So yeah, that sorta thing can be done quite easily. Pretty horrid and shocking stuff. Talk about grim work.