Okay. You've discovered a flaw in my grammar. I was trying to include smoking, chewing, snuff-using, etc., all in one line. But I'm sure my meaning was clear, even though my grammar was imprecise. I have no standards. However, tobacco kisses and second-hand smoke make me physically ill.
Hi Octavia- Yes, you do deserve a Prius! If I've learned one thing over the years, it is that you can't let others define who you are ... you just be true to yourself and create a path that works for you. You seem like a very sweet person, and time will heal wounds. Life can be such a positive learning experience and joyous if you hold your hands out for it. It takes time to learn how to "drop the guilt" and believe you are deserving, but it will happen. ... and sometimes you have to remind yourself everyday until you believe it yourself. So, enjoy your new Prius guilt free! Obviously, you are on a new exciting journey for yourself ... so enjoy the ride!
Yeah, if you didn't have any standards, you could end up with me. The whole problem with the world is that women have standards. If it weren't for that, I wouldn't have to be alone.
a little late to the table here and i did not read much beyond this page, but... being financially challenged does not mean living poor. it only emphasizes the importance of making what money you do have and therefore your purchase decisions count as much as possible. i have said it many times before and it bears repeating. 1) the Prius is not cheap 2) its not overpriced 3) the Prius, dollar for dollar, is the best car on the road today.
You are right of course, but also you are wrong. Daniel, Since you keep putting this out there, I am going to respond. It's almost as if you are daring someone to prove to you that you are indeed lovable. If there was one reason that I would say; "I would not date Daniel" it would be because you seem to take every opportunity to devalue yourself. I am in the business of learning to value myself so we clearly have a difference in world view and priorities. I have seen your picture, there is nothing in what I saw of you physically to cause me to not date you. It is your attitude, and unwillingness to see the good in yourself that warns me away. Of course I cannot speak for all women but I CAN speak with psudo authority as a psychology person; YOU are creating this reality of loneliness and only YOU can change it. As a woman, my three "have to haves" are integrity, intelligence, and confidence. I'd say you have two out of three! Again, I can't speak for all women but I'm pretty sure most women would be highly attracted to a man who has those three things going on. JMHO, ~Oct
After the Zap Xebra. If you kick a dog every day, it will learn to expect to be kicked. If it had reason, it would probably conclude that there is a reason why you kick it every day. I am 61 years old. In my adult life, I believe I have dated exactly four women, and the only one who went out with me more than 3 times before breaking it off was a mentally ill nymphomaniac in Mexico who later admitted that she had hoped I would marry her so she could get into the U.S. She also said she would not be monogamous. And you want me to have confidence??? I figure it's damn likely there's a reason they all turn me down. I know there's something wrong with me. Maybe more than one thing. I have had female friends, all of whom have told me that I'd make "some women" a great husband, but none of whom would go out with me. And I'm supposed to have confidence? Confidence comes from experience. The first time you cross a river by jumping from rock to rock you figure there's a good chance you'll fall in. If you make it, you gain a wee bit of confidence. By the third or fourth time you get a bit more. By the 25th or 50th time you have confidence. But if every time you try to cross the river you fall in, and you keep trying, and you keep falling in, you finally learn (if you are not completely deluded) that you are going to fall in. No, I don't have confidence. And imagining that confidence is just a state of mind that you can choose, the way you'd choose the color of your socks for the day, is as delusional as when Christians claim that non-Christians know that Christians have the real truth but are just too stubborn, or too committed to evil to admit it. I still try to cross that river when the opportunity presents. But until and unless one day I make it across once, I ain't gonna have confidence that I'll make it to the other side. Confidence is not a choice. It's the result of experience. Or delusion.
I agree with you and I can relate. My challenge has been to find my confidence. To illustrate: Several months ago, I was dating a man and one evening, feeling frisky we decided to take some rather artistic photo's of ourselves in lingerie. While going through our collection of cool and sexy shots, I remember this knot in the pit of my stomach, and as each new shot of me came up on the camera, I would notice this flaw or that pooch, and cringe. The knot grew. I was wishing I had never let him talk me into this. Several shots later, he turned to me and bright eyed asked; "What do you think?" I groaned and started to point out to him all of the flaws I found in myself in all of those pictures. He looked dumbfounded and very honestly said, "I didn't even noticed that", or "Really, I thought that looked good there." He sat me down and gave me his perception of the photos. For the first time in a long time, I saw myself through someone else's eyes. My flaws were still there, he just hadn't noticed them because he was to busy focused on what was good about me. I still have those pictures and I cherish them. They ( and he) taught me that sometimes people don't see our flaws and that is ok. It is not my job to point them out to them. Maybe they don't think they are flaws, or maybe.. they don't care that I have flaws. For me, confidence building has had a lot to do with learning to overlook my own flaws. To see the pictures and say: That is good! Its also about identifying what things make me feel confident and bringing that into my life. I know for me, my level of fitness plays a HUGE role in how confident I feel. So... that's what I'm working on these days. JME, ~oct
Oh, you're reading way too much into this, gray. Tone down the testosterone. Besides, it sounded to me like the guy was wearing lingerie, too, and that doesn't turn me on. Sorry if that disappoints anyone.
This once again illustrates . . . this thread is worthless without pics! (Leave him out, thank you very much) Careful, some anonymous person may want you to perform the same healing process for "him". Shoe on the other foot you might say . . .
confidence is a wonderful thing, but like everything in life, can be overdone. what you need to do is post the pics so we can make sure that you are well grounded in your perceptions