Help!!! My dog, oh my dog... my sanity, oh my sanity, is gone.

The Kennel Club

 

Ya think? Public decency prohibits me from posting about the things I like.

 

LOL! Does it have anything to do with what happens after a dog eats one of your socks?

 

Dog steak?

 

Dog crying on the patio while scooting along on its rear, trying to get the rest of the sock out of its exhaust pipe. Owner was a co-worker who said he had to go out there and do a canine rectal sock-ectomy.

 

Ouch!

 

Really! I try to be bad and you guys just get worse. Think I'm gonna fit right in here.

 

We colonists can get pretty crude sometimes.

 

BIG Ouch!!

 

That is not how you give a dog the boot!

 

Actually, a soul & a sole.

 

It also has two tongues.

 

Orvis, a company that made its fame with fly fishing equipment has probably the best (and most expensive) line of dog gear I have seen.

They have a dog safety harness that can be used in the car as a "seat belt," as well as used outside the car for walking. It is actually one of their cheaper items at $30.

I have one of their rear seat covers, which is fantastic, but cost me a cool $90. But it does keep the back seat spotless....


Orvis Quality Dog Products -- Orvis

 

The cover in my back seat is not quilted microfiber, but it was much less expensive.

 

You know.....
This is why there are so many Prius memes on the interwebs.

So......
At the risk of inflaming the already delicate sensitivities of the PITA crowd, I would like to point out that the anti-Darwin device under the copilot seat can be disabled if you know a little bit about them.

The reason I have personal experience with this isn't because I'm a dog lover, because I'm more of a cat person myself and any cat with any amount of self-worth would not willingly subject themselves to being imprisoned, unrestrained, in a one and a half ton projectile made out of metal and glass that's being semi-guided by a partially attentive human driver.........on a road filled with other such vehicles.

Cats, you see, are much smarter than canines.
I know..... It does not take much.

Back......to the front seat.
I have to carry half of my body weight in tools and sundries with me as I work tirelessly helping to provide seamless communications throughout the Southeast United States.
Since half of my body weight is considerably more than the 40# or so that it takes to activate the anti-Darwin device that Lawyers in the "Buzz-Kill Car Company" make them put into their cars, I have to latch the seatbelt under my tool-bag in order to silence the alarm.
Simple....right?

SO.......
Since we already know that dogs will not sit obediently on an already fastened seatbeld, there's also the possibility that you can disconnect the air line from underneath the co-pilot seat that's going into a little connector in the seat of the seat.

If you know anything about Whoopee cushions........and who in telecommunications DOESN'T???
This should render your co-pilot seat more Darwin compliant.
Just remember to re-connect it when you sell the car.

Or?

Don't.
Statistically it won't matter either way.....


If all of this is just too much bother you could always just get a cat.

Your call.

 

Orvis stopped selling the one I purchased -- it is heavy nylon with a rubberized back with the tiny grabber feet. Hooks around the headrests, etc. Completely waterproof.

Backseat looks new, despite carrying around a very wet, muddy dog for eight years.