Maybe Groucho and Twain were really the same person. Think about it; did you ever see both of them together? Tom
Neither of those quotes sounds like Twain to me. Both have the distinctive stamp of Groucho. He might not have originated them, but he certainly would have said them, and probably did.
"I thought this was a quotes thread not a discussion on the accuracy of a quote thread" - - - Trebuchet, Nov, 12, 2010
"I've now been in 57 states -- I think one left to go." --Barack Obama at a campaign event in Beaverton, Oregon
It's not really a quote if it's mis-attributed. In fact, quoting someone incorrectly can be libel. So I think discussions on the accuracy of quote attributions are permissible.
They shared the planet for 20 years, who knows? Samuel Langhorne Clemens --- November 30, 1835 – April 21, 1910 Julius Henry "Groucho" Marx --- October 2, 1890 – August 19, 1977
You should always know when you’re shifting gears in life. You should leave your era; it should never leave you. ~ Leontyne Price
A conservative is a man with two perfectly good legs who, however, has never learned how to walk forward. Franklin D. Roosevelt
"Human beings are perhaps never more frightening than when they are convinced beyond doubt that they are right.". Laurens Van der Post
BLESSED ARE THE Whackadoodles, FOR THEY LET IN THE LIGHT! TWENTY-NINE LINES TO MAKE YOU SMILE 1. My husband and I divorced over religious differences. He thought he was God and I didn't. 2. I don't suffer from insanity; I enjoy every minute of it. 3. Some people are alive only because it's illegal to kill them. 4. I used to have a handle on life, but it broke. 5. Don't take life too seriously; No one gets out alive. 6. You're just jealous because the voices only talk to me 7. Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder. 8. Earth is the insane asylum for the universe. 9. I'm not a complete idiot -- Some parts are just missing. 10. Out of my mind. Back in five minutes. 11. NyQuil, the stuffy, sneezy, why-the-heck-is-the-room-spinning medicine. 12. God must love stupid people; He made so many. 13. The gene pool could use a little chlorine. 14. Consciousness: That annoying time between naps. 15. Ever stop to think, and forget to start again? 16. Being 'over the hill' is much better than being under it! 17. Wrinkled Was Not One of the Things I Wanted to Be When I Grew up. 18. Procrastinate Now! 19. I Have a Degree in Liberal Arts; Do You Want Fries With That? 20. A hangover is the wrath of grapes. 21. A journey of a thousand miles begins with a cash advance. 22. Stupidity is not a handicap. Park elsewhere! 23. They call it PMS because Mad Cow Disease was already taken. 24. He who dies with the most toys is nonetheless DEAD. 25. A picture is worth a thousand words, but it uses up three thousand times the memory. 26. Ham and eggs... A day's work for a chicken, a lifetime commitment for a pig. 27. The trouble with life is there's no laugh track or background music. 28. The original point and click interface was a Smith & Wesson. 29. I smile because I don't know what the hell is going on. Appreciate every single thing you have, especially your friends! Life is too short and friends are too few !
Because I have this one copied already for another thread here: "Democracy is the theory that the common people know what they want, and deserve to get it good and hard." - H.L. Mencken
I don't think anybody is going to sue us for using a common misperception for the quote's author. There are many quotes that are anonymous or have even the experts in disagreement over who really said it first or said it in the way that we know it now. A post or two on the author is fine, but this was taking up more room than the actual point of the thread was.
With apologies for using the same quote in two different threads: "Faith is believing what you know ain't so." -- Mark Twain
"Spare change?" -- Some guy in the parking lot in front of the 7-11 near the hotel when I was in Ft. Lauderdale. (And, yes, I gave him a few bucks. -- I don't believe Jesus was the christ, but I do think he gave good advice sometimes. I always feel better when I give these guys a few bucks than when I don't.)
"Hazn youn spenezr adolrer?" -- Some guy in front of the White's Market in Ann Arbor. No one has ever been able to determine exactly what he is saying, but the best guess is "Can you spare a dollar?" Tom
